Lost Parts and Lacking Knowledge in Spanish

A few more "funny" stories.





*****NOTE* Loraina Bobbit was a woman who had been raped by her husband and several years later got up in the middle of the night and had noticed a carving knife on the counter and remembered about the difficulties in their relationship, grabbed the knife and went in her room with her husband and preceded to chop off half of his genitalia which he then had to get sewn back on*****



"A man in his mid-fifties did a Loraina Bobbit on himself in a drunken rage and ended up in the ER. The urologist thought that he could reattach the mans genitalia if it could be recovered and if it was in good condition. The police were dispatched to the man's house and the search was on. During the search one of the officers heard a choking sound coming from the man's poodle that was sitting in the corner. After a brief fight the officer was able to retrieve the man's jewels from the dog's mouth. After inspection of the parts by the urologist it was decided that the man would need to be taught to pee while sitting (if you know what I mean). The officer was given a commendation from his precinct for medical assistance."



Once again.. an issue that had occured while drinking.. As painful as this story is.. I find it humorous. I'm sure his family and friends also do, but not his wife/girlfriend. I'm curious as to why he decided to do this. And I don't really have anything else to say about this story.


"A doctor who spoke limited Spanish was rushed to a car in the ER parking lot to find a Spanish woman in the process of giving birth. Wanting to tell the woman to push he started yelling "Puta! Puta! Puta!" At this the grandmother started to cry and the baby's father had to be restrained. What the doctor should have been saying was "Puja!" (Push!) Instead he was saying "Whore! Whore! Whore!""



Well, I guess that word was the one that stuck out in his mind.. As for the Spanish woman and her family, if it were me, I would deffinately be angry.


"An elderly woman came into the ER complaining: "I got the green vines in my virginny" (Interesting). A pelvic exam verifies that she did, indeed, have a six inch vine growing out of her vagina. Further inspection revealed that she had a mass in her vaginal vault. It was easily removed and looked very much like a potato. It was, indeed, a potato. The patient said that her uterus was falling out and that she "put a potato in there to hold it up" and then forgot about it."

Do uterus's normally fall out? Can they fall out? Well,
"A vaginal prolapse is a condition in which structures such as the uterus, rectum, bladder, urethra, small bowel, or the vagina itself may begin to prolapse, or fall, out of their normal positions. Without medical treatment or surgery, these structures may eventually prolapse farther and farther into the vagina or even through the vaginal opening if their supports weaken enough. "http://women.webmd.com/vaginal-prolapse
Why someone would stick a potato up there... you got me. And forgetting about it? Got me again.. However, this could have been very dangerous because like the other story from yesterday.. it may have caused a reaction because the body doesn't know what it is. Hopefully this woman is okay, however she may have been afflicted with some side effects.


Until next time,
Skylar. : )